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diff --git a/blog/blog.atom b/blog/blog.atom index 6c13af0..78b7b40 100644 --- a/blog/blog.atom +++ b/blog/blog.atom @@ -3,25 +3,25 @@ <title>isopod.cool blog</title> <id>https://isopod.cool/blog/</id> <link rel="alternate" href="https://isopod.cool/blog/"></link> - <updated>2025-06-12T00:00:00+00:00</updated> + <updated>2025-08-25T00:00:00+00:00</updated> <author> <name>Hannah Isopod</name> - <uri>https://isopod.cool/</uri> + <uri>https://isopod.cool/about/</uri> </author> <generator>ME</generator> <category term="personal"/> <category term="blog"/> <category term="tech"/> - <!--entry> - <title>Succumbing to the Inevitable</title> - <id>how_my_blog_works</id> - <link rel="alternate" href="https://isopod.cool/blog/posts/how_my_blog_works/" type="html" title="Succumbing to the Inevitable"></link> - <published>2024-12-18T00:00:00+00:00</published> - <updated>2024-12-18T00:00:00+00:00</updated> - <summary>The explanation of my blog's under-the-hood workings that became inevitable the minute I started writing custom code for it.</summary> - <category term="self-hosting"/> - <category term="php"/> - </entry--> + <entry> + <title>Building a Very Regular Bed</title> + <id>building_a_regular_bed</id> + <link rel="alternate" href="https://isopod.cool/blog/posts/building_a_regular_bed/" type="html" title="Building a Very Regular Bed"></link> + <published>2025-08-25T00:00:00+00:00</published> + <updated>2025-08-25T00:00:00+00:00</updated> + <summary>I just moved and the new digs are kinda lacking in square footage. In this one, I design and build a loft bed from scratch to try to fix that.</summary> + <category term="diy"/> + <category term="project"/> + </entry> <entry> <title>Revealing All My Deepest Blogging Secrets (Blog questions challenge)</title> <id>blog_questions</id> @@ -87,6 +87,7 @@ <category term="self-hosting"/> <category term="diy"/> <category term="hardware"/> + <category term="project"/> </entry> <entry> <title>How to Set Up Pi-Hole (On a Le Potato)</title> @@ -134,6 +135,7 @@ <category term="self-hosting"/> <category term="diy"/> <category term="hardware"/> + <category term="project"/> </entry> <entry> <title>My Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Distro Hop</title> diff --git a/blog/media/banner-statuscafe.png b/blog/media/banner-statuscafe.png Binary files differdeleted file mode 100644 index c95f7fd..0000000 --- a/blog/media/banner-statuscafe.png +++ /dev/null diff --git a/blog/posts/building_a_regular_bed/RIP.webp b/blog/posts/building_a_regular_bed/RIP.webp Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..420d654 --- /dev/null +++ b/blog/posts/building_a_regular_bed/RIP.webp diff --git a/blog/posts/building_a_regular_bed/SMOKINHOT.webm b/blog/posts/building_a_regular_bed/SMOKINHOT.webm Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..f5bf2e2 --- /dev/null +++ b/blog/posts/building_a_regular_bed/SMOKINHOT.webm diff --git a/blog/posts/building_a_regular_bed/bed1.png b/blog/posts/building_a_regular_bed/bed1.png Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..0cc0a73 --- /dev/null +++ b/blog/posts/building_a_regular_bed/bed1.png diff --git a/blog/posts/building_a_regular_bed/bed2.png b/blog/posts/building_a_regular_bed/bed2.png Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..57428b3 --- /dev/null +++ b/blog/posts/building_a_regular_bed/bed2.png diff --git a/blog/posts/building_a_regular_bed/h4h_haul.webp b/blog/posts/building_a_regular_bed/h4h_haul.webp Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..d8ac924 --- /dev/null +++ b/blog/posts/building_a_regular_bed/h4h_haul.webp diff --git a/blog/posts/building_a_regular_bed/hashtagmytools.webp b/blog/posts/building_a_regular_bed/hashtagmytools.webp Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..1fc1ce9 --- /dev/null +++ b/blog/posts/building_a_regular_bed/hashtagmytools.webp diff --git a/blog/posts/building_a_regular_bed/immovable_object.webp b/blog/posts/building_a_regular_bed/immovable_object.webp Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..f21190c --- /dev/null +++ b/blog/posts/building_a_regular_bed/immovable_object.webp diff --git a/blog/posts/building_a_regular_bed/index.md b/blog/posts/building_a_regular_bed/index.md new file mode 100644 index 0000000..0d856ae --- /dev/null +++ b/blog/posts/building_a_regular_bed/index.md @@ -0,0 +1,311 @@ +I recently moved. I finally picked up and left the dying oil mining town that's been my place of residence for the past two long, long decades in favor of a real Big City with actual computer stores, and freeways, and lovely wonderful traffic, and Costco. This is a huge awesome deal for many many reasons, but that's beside the point here. + +Due to circumstances that aren't your business, for at least the next couple months my living situation is going to consist of a cramped bedroom with just about exactly enough, well, room for my existing computer desk and queen-sized mattress, leaving very little space for all the other hobbies I get up to (read: buy equipment for and then spend all day updating my website and playing Risk of Rain 2). This won't do. I must find some way to make better use of my limited floor space. + +Besides that, I also elected not to keep my old bedframe after the move because it was flimsy, ugly, and generally shit and/or bad, so I'll be needing a new one of those. I'm not about to get one of those shitty IKEA ones that would for suresies collapse under my weight, and the only pre-fab adult ones I could find go for somewhere in the ballpark of 4 grand *US*, which is, put lightly, outside of my price range. This confluence of factors means that in what will certainly come as a refreshing change of pace from the usual insipid Linux-user-posting, you get to watch me improvise a loft bed today. + +Small content warning: I'm gonna be using exclusively US units for this project, because even though I'm not in the States, that's still how just about all construction products are sized in my bass-ackwards country and it's easier not to bother converting. + +## My Grand Master Plan + +### #goals + +1. Obviously, this bedframe needs to accommodate the queen mattress I already have. I'm not opposed to switching to a narrower mattress to save even more floor space in theory, but a new mattress would cost about as much if not more than the materials for this whole project, so I'm not doing that. + +2. I want it high up enough that I can comfortably sit at my desk underneath it — A rough measurement places the sweet spot for this in the ballpark of 5 feet of vertical space between the bottom of the mattress support structure and the floor. At the same time, if I can swing it, I'd like to be able to adjust it to a lower height so it'll be less cramped to sleep in and easier to get into if and when I find myself in a living situation where I'm not hurting for floor space quite as much. + +3. It needs to be easy to take apart and move, because It's not like I'm gonna build this thing inside my small little bedroom and I'll almost certainly need to move it *again* at least once before the year is out. This can mostly be accomplished with strategic use of threaded inserts and nice chunky bolts, but this combined with my desire for adjustability will affect the design considerably. + +4. I want my bed to be sturdy. I'm not about to put my sleeping body on top of and my computer underneath something that's at all flimsy. Beyond the safety and property damage concerns, I'll probably sleep better in something that doesn't start swaying every time I roll over. + +5. The simpler, the better. I want this thing to have as few parts to break as I can manage, and require as little engineering effort on my part as possible. Nothing too fancy. No fuckin', like, motors or whatever the hell people on Youtube are doing with their clickbait ass loft bed builds. This ties into the sturdiness requirement to an extent, and I also need to actually be able to build the thing with my extremely limited woodworking experience. + +### The general shape of it + +Rather than spend two paragraphs flailing around trying to describe the design I came up with with words, I just went and modeled the thing. + +<figure class="media"> + <div> + <div class="gallery"> + <img src="bed1.png" alt="Crude 3D render of a queen-sized loft bed, consisting of four large posts that span the full height of the bed joined together by thinner beams with generous diagonal bracing. There's also a headboard."> + <img src="bed2.png" alt="Another render of the same bed, but blown apart and with the mattress removed to show the parts that were hidden in the first render, such as the slats and center beam supporting the mattress and the bottom diagonal bracing on the two far sides. The posts have grooves cut into them to fit the cross beams."> + </div> + <figcaption style="margin-top: 0;">I should have made this anyway, but I'll admit the thing that finally motivated me to do it was having a visual aid to put here.</figcaption> + </div> +</figure> + +The legs are 6x6 posts, and the cross beams on the sides are 2x6's with the diagonal braces made of 2x4's. In other words, this thing is built like a deck. It's almost certainly overkill for a bed, but that's kinda the point. I'm not a structural engineer, I'm a hobbyist computer toucher with access to a circular saw and a cordless drill and next to no woodworking experience, so my preferred strategy is to way overbuild to compensate for my amateur-hour design. + +The posts will be left at their full 8-foot length to match my ceiling and the whole bed is designed so I can make them veritically reversible, allowing me to flip them over to put the bed closer to the ground. To expedite taking it apart for either that or to move it, anything that attaches to the posts will do so using the biggest bolts the hardware store will sell me matching threaded inserts for. + +The slats, center beam, and headboard in the model are ones that I bought used for this project. I know I insulted IKEA's bed game before, but the center beam I'll be using is their SKORVA unit. There are a few reasons I like it for this: Firstly, it's made of steel, so I don't expect it to sag or snap in half over time like the rest of the materials in an IKEA bedframe. Secondly, it's adjustable, which is good because this design requires it to be a bit of a weird length to accommodate the depth of my headboard. Thirdly, the way it mounts means it's really easy to remove for disassembly. + +I've left the diagonal bracing off on two sides of the bottom for easier access, and on top on the side facing the wall so I can put some kind of nightstand there. It's not in the model because I'm planning to just improvise it out of the off-cuts from the 2x6's, and it's really not important to the general structure of the bed. I'm also not bothering to design a railing because I expect the top bracing to serve that function well enough. + +I don't have a very specific plan cosmetically at this point, which is probably good because there's frankly a snowball's chance in hell I actually execute it well if I had one. I do know I want it to look good with my existing grey bedding. Roughly, I want to leave the corner posts more or less alone visually, maybe stain them, and then either paint or stain the rest black. I'm not expecting this thing to be a looker per se, but I'm gonna do my best not to make it ugly. + +## Gear Acquisition + +I was originally planning to buy another bedframe on Kijiji or similar and hack off the mattress support structure and headboard to reuse them, but before I could pull the trigger on that I was made aware of a feature of Da Big City called a "Habitat For Humanity ReStore". This turned out to be very helpful, because I got all that stuff for half the price I was gonna pay for a full bedframe to chop apart, and I found this great upholstered headboard! + +<figure class="media"> + <div> + <div class="gallery"> + <img src="h4h_haul.webp" alt="An upholstered headboard and its mounting hardware, a bundle of slats, and the support hardware for those slats sitting in my garage."> + </div> + <figcaption style="margin-top: 0;">Ignore those metal side rails. I bought those and then realized they're too short for a queen mattress. I'm probably just gonna use 2x2s or something instead.</figcaption> + </div> +</figure> + +The IKEA center beam hooks onto a special bracket on each end. These weren't included, but as it turns out IKEA will just mail some to you free of charge if you ask nicely (fill out a form on their website). + +As you might reasonably expect, all the fasteners, various finishing goops, and/or any other miscellaneous items I needed to buy came from the hardware store, over the course of more visits than I'd like to admit. I'm lucky enough to already have access to most of the tools I'll need for this, but I did have to buy a chisel to make those notches for the cross beams. I also bought one new tool used on Kijiji, but we'll come back to that later. + +I also ended up ordering a couple things online — just accessories, like a wall-mountable lamp and a panel mount power outlet. I tried to find that stuff in the hardware store, but all the ones they had were designed for installation in, like, the walls of your house, and I refuse to include mains electrical wiring in the scope of this project. + +### My Wood + +The hardware store had all the sizes of board I wanted, but they only had the 4x4's and 6x6's in pressure-treated form — essentially, that means they've been chemically treated to resist rot for outdoor applications, especially in contact with the ground. Not only is this wholly unnecessary in any environment you'd put a mattress in, but the toxic chemicals used in the treatment process make this stuff kind of a bitch to work with. Or so I've read online. + +Fortunately, living in Da Big City came in clutch here once again, by providing me with a decent selection of actual real-life lumber yards that sold the big stupid beams I wanted in flavours other than poison. I'm not sure what exactly I was expecting from the process, but it was simpler than that. I walked up to the front desk, told them what sizes of lumber I needed, and they accepted my payment and had me take my car around back to load it up. Once again, my social anxiety has lied to me. It was at this point that I learned *exactly* how much lumber will fit in a late model Subaru Outback. + +<figure class="media"> + <div> + <div class="gallery"> + <img src="lumber_haul.webp" alt="The back of my car, a late model Subaru Outback, packed with 4 6x6's, 2 4x4's, and 7 2x4's. They're mostly crammed over the center console and atop the passenger seat. It's clearly near capacity for cargo of this form factor."> + </div> + <figcaption style="margin-top: 0;">I didn't think to take this photo until after I'd taken out the 2x6's, but this gives you the basic idea. I'm pissed that the front passenger seat in this car doesn't fold down, otherwise it would actually be pretty well suited to this.</figcaption> + </div> +</figure> + +They didn't actually have the 2x3's I wanted to use under the slats though. I had to get those from the hardware store. + +Now, while the lumber yard I went to did have the **extra thicc** posts necessary to execute my vision in flavours more palatable than what I could get at the hardware store, the only other kind they had in stock was rough cut, and my dumb ass heard this and did not think to ask any follow up questions such as "might you be getting smoother lumber in stock in the future" or, for that matter, to just keep shopping around, so now I've got a bunch of 6x6's with a low-double-digit grit rating. + +This isn't the end of the world, and in fact probably means I got these cheaper than I otherwise would have, but it does have a couple of rammys (cool way to say ramifications): for one, it's going to take some elbow grease to smooth these out enough to work with, and for two, I've kind of backed myself into a corner aesthetically. You can see in the photo up there that one of those posts has a pretty gnarly split on the one corner, and another has what I am choosing to think of as a live edge. Those are gonna be tough if not wholly outside my capabilities to hide, so I'm thinking I lean into it. It'll look, uh, rustic. Yeah. + +For finishing liquids, I initially went with two colours of this combination stain/polyurethane stuff, then did more research on it and saw such overwhelmingly negative sentiment from the Redditors that I was moved to return it and buy some real (if cheap) stain and some real poly. I went with oil-based for both, and the colours I went with were black and something called "puritan pine". I'll admit, if you're having any reaction to all that other than confusion, it probably means more to you than it does to me. If this was a Youtube video, this would be the bit where I start rattling off the dictionary definition of "foreshadowing" and cut halfway through the first sentence. + +### Getting a "new" tool + +There was precious little I could do on this project before I got those rough cut posts ready to work with, and it was readily apparent that my cheapo orbital sander was not up to the task, so I needed a new tool. Of course, in an ideal world I would be able to do that with a jointer and a thickness planer, but those two tools would eat up like, most of the money I have at the moment, even used, and I can't seem to find anywhere to rent them, so that's out. I also don't own a router nor have a large, perfectly flat workbench to build one of those massive surfacing jigs for one, so I guess the only real option left is a hand planer. + +My uncle, who recently did up a bedframe of his own, originally offered to lend me his, but that fell through since he couldn't give me his battery and none of mine are compatible. Instead, I found a listing on Kijiji for a lot of four power tools for 80 Metric Dollars, including a jigsaw, a moderately dirty belt sander, an impact wrench attachment for an air compressor, and the one I was interested in, this distinctly vintage looking electric hand planer. + +<figure class="media"> + <div> + <div class="gallery"> + <img src="planer.webp" alt="A dirty, old-looking corded electric hand planer with a beefy metal housing and no visible branding."> + </div> + </div> +</figure> + +There's no visible branding on this device, but perusing image search results for "vintage eletric hand plane" led me to [this page](http://vintagemachinery.org/photoindex/detail.aspx?id=37904) on the appropriately old-looking vintagemachinery.org featuring an identical-looking unit apparently called a Model No. 1701 Type 1 Electric Planer from the Illinois-based Portable Electric Tools, Inc. Might I just say, very clever name, right up there with General Motors and Advanced Micro Devices. The page claims that it "looks like a heavy duty, well made tool", and I'm inclined to agree with that assessment. If you could feel the weight of this thing, I suspect you'd feel the same way. + +After getting rear-ended on the way to go get it by a walking stereotype of a Dodge Ram driver in a Dodge Ram after braking suddenly because the Dodge Ram in front of me braked suddenly (I'm fine, but the car needed a new liftgate. Insurance covered it.) I took the thing home and discovered that the ground pin on the power connector was snapped off. Cool. It didn't shock me when I turned it on, though, so I'm guessing it's probably maybe hopefully fine. If I never publish this post, you'll know I died. + +More immediately important to the usability of the tool was the fact that the cut depth adjustment was completely seized. The relevant piece is held on using the adjustment knob on the front, and after taking that off and *persuading* it a little with a rubber mallet, getting it working again was a simple matter of cleaning all the grime and probably-retirement-age wood shavings out and drenching every internal surface in WD-40 before reassembly. + +Other than that, the thing seems to work fine, though I'm sure it's overdue just about every possible maintenance procedure. I will figure out what those are and attempt them when it breaks and not a moment sooner, she said foreshadowingly. + +## Building the stupid thing + +### Prep + +The very first thing I did towards actually building the bed was cut the diagonal braces, long-side cross beams, supports for the slats, and the rungs for a heretofore undiscussed ladder. This was everything I knew for sure I could do without having to compare against any dimension of the as-yet-unassembled bed. Before I could do anything else, I had to get those rough sawn boards smoothed out. + +I'll admit it took me a while to do this. The planing process left a lot of artifacts that had to be taken out with sanding, especially since I didn't notice until after I'd finished that one of the blades was misaligned, so I'd planed every face of every post at somewhat of an angle — the fact that the blades probably haven't been sharpened in quite a while certainly didn't help either. Rustic it is. I'll have to do more to restore this thing before I use it again. + +I started out sanding with the orbital sander because that's what I had sandpaper for on hand, and got through about one and a half faces of one of the boards over the course of two-odd hours before giving up and just going and buying sandpaper for my aforementioned-briefly-in-passing new-to-me WEN Model 919 belt sander. This made the next two feet or so of sanding go much faster before it perished dramatically in a plume of smoke. + +<figure class="media"> + <div> + <div class="gallery"> + <video controls> + <source src="SMOKINHOT.webm" /> + In case the video didn't load, it's supposed to be a video of the belt sander emitting a plume of smoke from the motor housing. + </video> + <img src="RIP.webp" alt="My poor belt sander lays dead on my driveway, covered in fire extinguisher powder."> + </div> + <figcaption style="margin-top: 0;">It was worse than the video makes it look, and the video makes it look pretty bad. You might say, it's <em>cooked</em>.</figcaption> + </div> +</figure> + +Not wanting to go back to the orbital sander, I did something that would throw a wrench into the cleanly deliniated sections I had going here: I went out and bought the cheapest belt sander at the hardware store, an $85 Ryobi that I got for half of that because it was open box. Wow! The reason for this, as I would soon discover, was that it failed to grip the belt while actually sanding, rendering it useless. After returning it for what I must assume is a second time, I finally caved and shelled out for a decent belt sander, and I think it may have been worth it. Even including the three trips to the hardware store, this was much faster than the orbital sander, which is not to say that it was fast. Watching woodworking videos on Youtube where they complain about sanding does *not* prepare you for the reality of how long sanding takes. + +Speaking of sketchy tools, I need to complain about the awful folding saw horses I used (or tried to, at least) for this. I got these horrible things as a two pack for $40 and they are made of the flimsiest steel ever devised by humankind. The lateral force exerted by the act of using the planer was enough to make them topple over and they did so constantly up until I screwed them both to the sheet of plywood I bought to make a backing board for the shelving I intended to add, and in trying to re-deploy that contraption the next day I managed to fold the bracing on one of them, and *then* I broke a weld trying to bend it back into place. In summary, don't buy Anvil brand saw horses. They're cheap for a reason. Anyway, + +Having sanded the rough-cut posts to my satisfaction, it was immediately apparent that my pre-surfaced 2x4's were actually quite substantially rougher, so those had to be sanded down too. Not that it's a big deal, since all of the wood had to be sanded further anyway for staining and it's not like I'm gonna be knocking down much of significance with 180 grit or whatever. But that's later. + +### What I would consider to be the "fun part" + +Before sanding past 50 grit, I wanted to get all the rest of my cutting done. Most of this process is unremarkable, save for my darling 6x6's, which, much like yours truly, are much too thick to fit on the miter saw I'm using. Astute readers will at this point be thinking "wait, but didn't she specifically intend not to cut those?" and are correct in this assessment, but this is the point where I noticed another small wrinkle brought on by my decision to get these rough-cut: they're all slightly different lengths, and they're all too long. See, my ceiling is just slightly taller than 8 feet, such that a 6-inch-wide board that's exactly 8 feet long could comfortably be stood up inside. If I tried to do that with these boards in their initial state, they would take differently sized chunks out of the drywall in my bizarre pseudo-popcorn ceiling. So they're gonna need to be cut after all. + +In leiu of the miter saw, the best suited tool available for this job was a handheld circular saw. Even then, no circular saw on planet earth is big enough to cut through something six inches thick, so I had to take a pass around each side and then finish off the center with a handsaw. The result of this technique in my imprecise amateur hands was some very uneven faces, which were fortunately easily smoothed out with even more sanding. + +This process also took a few hours longer than it should have, on account of the fact that I was using a cordless circular saw, probably the most baffling concept for a power tool I've ever had the misfortune of encountering. This thing ate through batteries that took most of an hour to charge in maybe a couple minutes of cutting if I was economical about it. For cutting the ends off the posts, this was workable. It still got done inside an afternoon. For the next thing I needed to do, it was not. + +Remember those notches I wanted to cut in the posts? The best technique for that with the tools I have to hand is a process that I believe is called kerf cutting, where you make a bunch of cuts right next to each other in the area you want gone and break off the resulting thin strips of wood. My plans require cutting notches the width and depth of a 2x6 on two faces of each of the four posts, which in layman's terms translates to a lot of cutting. I spent a couple battery charges of the cordless saw over the course of a couple hours getting maybe a fifth of the way through the first of the eight of these cuts I was gonna have to make. At this rate, this was gonna take weeks. + +It was clear that I needed a tool that wasn't reliant on the power storage capacity of a couple 16-year-old hunks of lithium. This time, I went back to Habitat for Humanity to see what they had, because apparently they sell tools. In among a kind of impressive assortment of tools mostly from the back half of the previous century (as well as a pickaxe of all things, which I was very tempted to buy) was this monstrous thing, a Skilsaw Model 554c 8-1/4" 13-amp corded circular saw, with an intact ground pin and everything! + +<figure class="media"> + <div> + <div class="gallery"> + <img src="skill_saw.webp" alt="A dirty, old-looking corded electric circular saw with a beefy metal housing and extremely visible 'Skilsaw' branding."> + </div> + <figcaption style="margin-top: 0;">I promise I'll have some photos that aren't of a power tool soon.</figcaption> + </div> +</figure> + +This thing worked a treat. On top of its lack of a need for batteries allowing me to get 100% of my remaining circular saw work done the day I bought the thing, it was perhaps unsurprisingly *way* more powerful than the battery-powered saw. It's clear to me why I only had to pay 10 Canadian SillyBucks for it — getting the sled aligned at exactly 90° to the blade is kind of a pain, for one — but I can't argue with results. + +<figure class="media"> + <div> + <div class="gallery"> + <img src="rslashshittyjoinery.webp" alt="A close up of two 6x6 posts where they've each had large notches, big enough to fit a 2x6, cut out of them on two sides. The notches are visibly imprecise."> + </div> + <figcaption style="margin-top: 0;">Ugly results maybe, but results. Again, rustic. Laughs nervously. Fortunately, most of this will be hidden.</figcaption> + </div> +</figure> + +I also had to use a chisel to clean up the notches after I was done with the saw. Let me just say that this sucked ass to do and it's a damn good thing every surface the chisel touched is gonna be hidden under an inch and a half of solid pine. There's "rustic", and then there's "looks like total ass". Either Dewalt chisels are ass or I was doing something very wrong. We will now be moving on. + +Next on the docket was installing the threaded inserts for the cross beams. Inserting them, you might say. Before doing anything irreversible, I made a little jig out of an off-cut to help me drill the holes consistently, which was a smart move, since in this case "consistently" wound up meaning "misaligned the same way every time". It shouldn't cause any serious problems, but it'll look a little off and a bunch of holes may or may not need to be enlarged if I ever want to actually use the adjustment mechanism I designed into this thing. To maintain a semblance of my own pride, I will not be showing any of that. + +Within minutes of it becoming too late to do this I realized I should have drilled the cross beams *first* and then used those as templates to drill into the posts, or better yet just clamp everything together and drill the holes all in one go. If I had yet gotten around to setting my 3D printer back up after the move, it probably would have also been smart to make the jig with that, seeing as it's clearly capable of much greater precision than me. + +Actually inserting the inserts was quite substantially more annoying than I expected it to be. They kept wanting to go in crooked, which was not helped by the fact that they were designed for a flathead driver, which gave me basically no leverage to correct them. I developed a technique where I would screw in a bolt and then pull on that until it was sticking out straight. This was probably made possible by the fact that I'm working with construction-grade softwoods that will just sort of give way when faced with a stiff breeze, but this proved something of a double-edged sword here, since I also had a couple inserts come out *with* the bolt while I was testing them, and one managed to ream out the hole I made for it such that it just starts spinning in place when I tighten it. Lucky thing that joint has three other bolts to pick up the slack. + +Now for the exciting part: the first test assembly. My plan here was to assemble the posts and cross-beams, and then measure/cut/attach everything to that structure. This would be the easiest way to guarantee that everything would fit together in the final assembly wihtout relying entirely too much on my ability to be precise. This, too, was not as easy as I expected it to be. The 6x6 posts can be stood up on their own with surprising stability on a flat surface, but I was assembling this in my driveway, which is slanted on purpose for "drainage" or some other stupid civic engineering type nonsense, which complicated matters slightly. + +Once it was up, I just used copious amounts of deck screws to make the side pieces, which consist of the cross beams, another 2x6 for a ledge on the top, and a 2x3 to hold the slats. A 2x3 feels like a strange choice here, but I wanted some extra horizontal leeway because I built the bed a little wide to accommodate the headboard, which is maybe an inch wider than a queen mattress, and wasn't confident my slats would be long enough. This also conveniently turned out to be about as wide as this piece could be without interfering with my access to the bolts on the inside facing the mattress, a quirk I completely forgot to account for in my design. + +### I'm just putting these headings in to break this up visually ngl. anyway here's finishing + +Cleverly forseeing that attaching the diagonal braces now would render some areas inaccessible with a power sander of any kind, I stopped here and disassembled the bed again for further processing. The original plan had been to sand up to 180 grit, but I didn't have any 180 grit sandpaper, so I sanded a piece with 120 grit, decided I was content with that level of smoothness, and stopped there because I want this to actually get done. Astonishingly, this took a lot less time than the 50 grit pass, I assume because I wasn't trying to knock down a bunch of like 1mm+ high spots. The second and final pass only took me two days of work! Wow! + +It was at this point that I decided to start staining stuff. As I had previously planned, I coloured the posts brown, and everything else black (including my forearms, legs, and feet because I was doing this while wearing a tshirt, shorts, and sandals). I started with the black parts, applying the stain with a foam brush and immediately wiping off the excess with a sold-by-the-pound hardware store "painter's rag". The result of this was a finish that would almost definitely require a second coat to reach a state I liked. For the big, already-assembled side pieces I just went "fuck it" and slathered the stain on with a rag, which actually resulted in almost exactly the desired look on the first go, though that could be because doing the entire thing just took too long and I didn't wipe the excess off in time. This was good, because I turned out to have exactly enough black stain to do a second coat on everything *but* those side assemblies. + +For the posts, I didn't even try with a brush and just went straight to the rag. The stain I went with for these was a lot... less flattering than the black — it highlighted a lot of the little defects that probably would have been removed if I'd bothered to sand past 120 grit. If you're playing this article's companion drinking game, where you drink every time I say "rustic" to deflect from my blatantly amateurish crafts<span title="craftswomanship? craftsbugship?">man</span>ship, go ahead and drink here. That said, I liked the overall colour it imparted into the wood so much that I decided not to bother with coat #2. + +People say "construction-grade" woods like pine and spruce don't take stain very well, but I think they're just going too far and/or not far enough. Clearly, you just need to either use something really mild that compliments the light wood or make it completely black, instead of trying to make it look like walnut or whatever. + +Applying the polyurethane made me regret listening to the Redditors about that combo stain/poly stuff — after coat #1 I remember noting that I would have been done by now if I hadn't. Honestly, given all the visual defects introduced by every step of this process from purchasing decisions onward, a weird-looking finish probably wouldn't have been all that noticeable. + +The poly was much thicker, tackier, and generally less pleasant to brush on than the stain, so I resolved that when I ran out I would replenish my supply with the wipe-on stuff instead. Luckily, this happened after one full coat. Switching to the thinner goop made the next coat much more pleasant, but it was also twice as expensive per unit product, and I went through a bottle and change of the stuff doing that one coat, so I opted to not do the recommended third or fourth except on the select surfaces that would see the most skin contact, in pursuit of not spending more on varnish than on the wood it was going on. + +The Redditors claim you can make your own wipe-on poly by cutting normal-on poly with mineral spirits, but my hardware store didn't carry anything labeled "mineral spirits", only "mineral spirit substitute", which I assume is meant as, like, a paint stripper or something, so I erred on the side of caution and didn't bother with that. I wish I could have, though, because clearly it would have saved me a lot of money. + +This is where my early resignment to a rustic (go ahead and take a shot now) aesthetic really saved my ass, because my technique was far from perfect here. There are a couple visible drips in the finish that I just... never sanded off, and a couple bristles from the cheap brush I was using are definitely lodged in there. I could go back and fix it, but — and this is kind of a driving philosophy for a lot of this project — I want this done more than I want it perfect. + +I understand why people seem to default to paint for this type of thing now. That would have been a lot easier and more forgiving than this. However, it would have looked a lot less cool, especially since all my raw materials have giant surface defects that would just look weird under a coat of paint. + +### Assembly DRAFT (Final) 3 (FINAL) this one (draft) 2 FINAL.docx + +Let's talk about that ladder. I haven't really mentioned it so far, and it wasn't even in my computer model, because it's that dead simple and honestly kind of secondary to the bed itself. I want to replace it with some kind of stair cabinet contraption in the future, but that's a whole other project and I needed a way to get into my bed now, hence this. The plan was to build it out of 4x4's for the sides and 2x4's for the rungs, with dimensions as described in [OSHA Standard 1926.1053(a)(3)(i) and 1926.1053(a)(4)(i)](https://archive.ph/pB5JN), and have it just bolt onto the bed. This was the easiest, and therefore first, task I did towards the final assembly. + +I attached the rungs with deck screws through the 4x4's, in deep countersinks since I don't have any wood screws longer than 4 inches. The only small problem was that I made a *lot* of tearout drilling those holes. I'll have to 3D-print some little caps to cover that. The other small problem was that one of the 4x4's was warped, and as such made the ladder warped, which isn't really an issue structurally for this but it is a little annoying. I was a touch worried about the load-bearing capacity of the 2x4's initially, but all of that anxiety evaporated completely the moment I screwed on the first rung and felt how solid it was. Real "that's not going anywhere" moment. + +The rungs actually *did* start going anywhere when I put my full weight on them, but that was because I screwed them in too close to the middle and they were twisting when I put my full weight on the front edge. I solved that with some more deck screws at an angle through the bottom. Luckily, it's not visible unless you're lying on the floor, which is the exact opposite of what you're doing when you use this bed. + +<figure class="media"> + <div> + <div class="gallery"> + <img src="immovable_object.webp" alt="A 5-foot handmade wooden ladder made of two 4x4's stained a very mild amber, with four rungs stained completely black."> + </div> + <figcaption style="margin-top: 0;">Ignore the prodigious post-move-in junk pile behind the ladder. If you were wondering, that's the reason I've been building stuff in the driveway.</figcaption> + </div> +</figure> + +This was also my first confirmation that my at this point irreversible aesthetic choices weren't completely unworkable dogshit. So that was nice. + +Next was to improvise a nightsand out of scrap. My 2x6 off-cuts were the obvious choice for this, being the same depth as the sides of the bed, which is why I stained and sealed them along with everything else. I had five pieces available for this: four that were all different but similar lengths in the ballpark of 21-22 inches, and one smaller 13-inch one. Not wanting to bother cutting any of them, the plan I eventually came up with was to assemble them in sort of a ├──┬──┤ shape, with the two longest pieces as horizontal shelving, the shortest piece as some kind of stupid divider in the middle, and the remaining pieces on the ends. + +That jigsaw from before (you know, in the Kijiji bundle listing with the planer?) unexpectedly came in clutch to make the various mounting and cable-routing holes for the electronics I wanted to install here. It was actually the best thing to come out of that purchase — it was the only one of those tools that didn't give me any trouble at all. + +I was now out of stuff to do to procrastinate on the most intimidating task left to go: assembling the thing in my driveway one last time to put on the diagonal braces. Here's what I came up with to attach them to the side pieces: deck screw through the 2x4 into the 2x6, pocket screws where I could still fit the pocket hole jig, and then these beefy steel brackets across the joint. Overkill? Who's she? + +Attaching the cross braces to the posts taught me to hate threaded inserts. I had the audacity to try to put them in at an angle, and just about every single goddamn one went in crooked. A couple of them would come out and lodge themselves in the brace when I undid the bolt, and one reamed its hole completely out such that I had to go back and drill it deeper to get it to tighten at all. Once it was done, though, the braces were all totally rock solid, and they really stiffened up the structure. It's almost like I planned it that way or something. + +It was during this step that my decision to apply the finish before assembling everything *really* paid off. + +<figure class="media"> + <div> + <div class="gallery"> + <img src="smth_about_a_parade.webp" alt="The bed in question, which bears a striking resemblance to the model from earlier, being shielded from the rain with a bedsheet stapled to the tops of the posts."> + </div> + <figcaption style="margin-top: 0;">SUCK MY UNWANTED AND UNASKED-FOR BALLS, MOTHER NATURE.</figcaption> + </div> +</figure> + +It's probably not ideal to have this stuff out in the rain, but the polyurethane coating did at least buy me enough time to wipe all the raindrops off without them soaking into the wood and causing havoc. As you can clearly see, some quick thinking with a random old bedsheet and the local cordless staple gun also helped. Fortunately, the rain died down pretty quick, but the wind took a bit longer. I had to add more staples at least once. + +After that, only a couple little things remained, mostly nightstand stuff. Mounting the lamp, measuring my little improvised shelf to cut the backing board out, etc etc. Then, + +## Installation + +As you might rightly imagine, this was a little more difficult to assemble in an actively-in-use bedroom with a little over twice the square footage of the bed itself, and that's *after* you get the eight huge pieces this comes in up the stairs and in there. It was very much a two-person job. I had to move some furniture just to move this thing into position, and I will admit it *may* have taken some cosmetic damage in the process. + +I waited until now to attach the headboard because I had realized partway through that the included complement of mounting hardware (read: two metal beams going a couple feet down from the back) would block some of the bolts, so it had to go on last. Further pondering revealed that even getting it into position with that mounting hardware on would be impossible, so I removed it and just screwed it directly to the back bracing, which really could have been done outside and saved me some trouble manoeuvering that shit in my little ass bedroom. + +I discovered at this point that, as I had predicted, the slats were just slightly too short. The unforseen result of this was that they could shift around enough to lose contact on one end and fall down, so I had to screw them in. + +After all that, I *finally*, after over a month of work, had this to show for it: + +<figure class="media"> + <div> + <div class="gallery"> + <img src="payoff.webp" alt="A queen-sized loft bed that I designed and built myself, made of 8-foot 6x6 posts for legs and various hardware store lumber for cross beams and bracing, all held together with giant bolts at each joint. The former is a nice wood tone while the latter is stained black. It has green curtains on the sides and a grey upholstered headboard that matches the grey bedding. My desk can be seen underneath it."> + </div> + <figcaption style="margin-top: 0;">The room was too small to get a better picture than this without using the grainy ass wide-angle sensor. It's almost as though I'm hurting for floor space in here.</figcaption> + </div> +</figure> + +I promise it looks more rustic in person. + +<figure class="media"> + <div> + <div class="gallery"> + <img src="nightstand.webp" alt="A closeup of my bed's built-in nightstand, a slightly shoddy affair consisting of three vertical pieces of black-stained 2x6 bridged by two longer ones horizontally between them. All this is screwed into the bed's side ledge, also a black 2x6, creating two different tiers of storage. Towards the right side is a 120V and USB outlet embedded into the top surface, and a lamp mounted on a swinging arm to the very right end. This assembly has a plywood backing board stained the same amber brown as the corner posts."> + <img src="pov.webp" alt="POV you're sleeping in my loft bed. You're surrounded by my grey IKEA bedding, a couple novelty pillows, and a Blahaj. There's about two feet of vertical space between the mattress you're lying on and the ceiling. At the edges of the bed, the greenish-blue blackout curtains prevent you from seeing any further."> + </div> + <figcaption style="margin-top: 0;">Really cozy.</figcaption> + </div> +</figure> + +I guess that gives you a better idea, huh? + +## Usage Impressions + +Honestly, this feels a lot less cramped both below and above than I was expecting it to be. I like it a lot. It's very cozy up top, and my ability to use my desk is thoroughly unimpeded. In fact, this structure provides a lot of convenient mount points for stuff in that area. Getting in is easier than I was expecting, but getting out is unsurprisingly kind of a pain. I intend to take the ladder off and modify it to be slanted, which should help. + +When I went up there for the first time, the person who helped me assemble it noticed a bit of flexing in the SKORVA beam when I moved around, which I can only logically assume is normal and is probably fine since it's designed for king beds with two people in them, but it's still scary for something with many, many dollars in computers underneath and my sleeping body up top. I have since gone to IKEA for a couple more to beef it up, plus some new blackout curtains to replace these bullshit fucking see-through ones I got from Amazon. + +The bed also darkens the room considerably — it's directly below the ceiling light, meaning it blocks light to my desk area and a considerable portion of the room, and when my shiny new IKEA blackout curtains are closed that light effectively does nothing. I may have to invest in several lamps if I want this room to be as bright as it used to be — I've already bought one for the desk. + +Also, building in outlets and a lamp up top was a stroke of genius on my part. + +## Postmortem + +I'd say this project was mostly a success. It's a little shittier and jankier than I had imagined, but that was to be expected. The one glaring exception is that I failed to make it adjustable. It had been becoming more and more clear that that wasn't really gonna be feasible with my level of skill and the quality of my materials for a while, but the moment I gave up on it was when I put the first diagonal braces on the back, measured the vertical distance between the cross member they were on and the points at which they mounted to the posts, and there was over an inch of difference. I think if I really want this thing lower in the future, my adjustment mechanism will be my ~~shiny~~ ~~new~~ circular saw. + +If I were to build another one, I don't think I would use these big stupid 6x6 posts, and I wouldn't keep them at their full length. Not only is a piece of wood that big a gigantic pain in the ass to move around, but they also represented about *half* the cost of lumber for this whole project. They're ridiculously strong, and I trust them with my life, but 4x4's would have been more than enough here. + +It also would have been nice to maybe try to use a few less bolts, or more importantly a few less threaded inserts. On top of being really annoying to use, those fuckers are NOT cheap. The threaded inserts alone cost more than, like, most of the power tools I bought for this combined. From what I've seen on Woodworking Youtube™ it seems like you're mostly supposed to use maybe like four of them to make your table come apart for easier transport or whatever, not upwards of 40 for every structurally important joint on a queen-sized bed. + +In the middle of this project I learned about a special type of bracket you can get that's meant specifically for this purpose. That could have made this a lot easier. I'll try to incorporate those if I ever find myself designing more beds. + +While we're alluding to cost, I'll admit this was maybe not as cost-effective as I was hoping. I mean, it came in *far* under my "could-have-just-bought-this-premade" benchmark of [4,000 or so Imperial Credits](https://adultbunkbeds.com/loft-beds/queen-loft-bed), but I was kind of hoping I could also beat at least some of the IKEA loft beds. I failed to accomplish this goal. I think I could manage with the knowledge and tools<sup id="n1r"><a href="#n1">1</a></sup> I acquired doing this — either way, though, I think this is more than twice as good as that flimsy garbage, and I get to keep the power tools! + +Speaking of tools, I put just about no effort into maintaining my tools during this project and it bit me in the ass a little. Mostly in the way of old, dull blades causing way more tearout than I would probably have had otherwise, but the main example is that misaligned planer that caused me hours of extra sanding with the deep slanted grooves it made. There's also the incident of that old belt sander just popping on me, but I suspect it was that poor thing's time anyway. + +I honestly think the final product looks pretty good, but I think my early decision to go for a rustic vibe was the sole thing that made that possible. The kinda shitty construction lumber I used is so full of cracks, small voids, and other surface defects that it would have looked incredibly weird under a coat of paint without like a full gallon of wood filler. Plus, it also hides a lot of the defects in my own workmanship, such as the horribly imprecise joinery and my complete failure to sand between coats of poly, not to mention all the lint that got in the finish from those cheap rags. If I had unlimited time to do this, I might not have settled for that part. + +All in all, would I recommend you do this? Fuck yeah, absolutely. In terms of utility, this thing is everything I hoped it would be. Absolutely goated way to maximize your floor space. If you have a small room, and you think you're handy enough to give this a shot, I say go for it. You're probably right. My only real woodworking experience going into this was a single class in 7th grade where my capstone project was a shitty tiny flimsy plywood shelf that had nails sticking out of it. Learn from my mistakes, though. Don't use rough-cut 6x6's. + +--- + +<p id="n1"><a href="#n1r">1</a>. Just for funsies, here's a photo I took of all the (surviving) tools I bought for this project. Except the Anvil saw horses. FUCK the Anvil saw horses. I'd wager about half the value here is tied up in that brand new belt sander.</p> + +
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Well, the first social media site I joi I still use Tumblr, just not as the hub for my entire online presence. I maintain that it is still the best<sup id="n2r"><a href="#n2">2</a></sup> centralized social media site. Anyway, a Carrd page became the central hub which linked to all my online profiles and which all my online profiles could link back to. Finally, I only had to update my frequently changing Tumblr link in one place. For the most part. -I perceived a certain stigma (at least on Tumblr) around having a Carrd page, and the sorts of people who made one. The stereotype was that you would have overly exhaustive BYF (Before You Follow) and DNI (Do Not Interact) lists full of sometimes outlandish criteria<sup id="n3r"><a href="#n3">3</a></sup>, probably have similar bullet point style lists of all your likes, dislikes, and possibly identities and triggers (!)<sup id="n4r"><a href="#n4">4</a></sup> and probably not be the most pleasant person to interact with. I like to think I bucked that trend. My Carrd pages were generally very simple: a profile picture, a short bio (some shit like "Name | 21 | 🇨🇦 | real life isopod"), and links to my socials. That was all. I remember adding the obligatory long-form bio and DNI list at some point, but those didn't last long. +I perceived a certain stigma (at least on Tumblr) around having a Carrd page, and the sorts of people who made one. The stereotype was that you would have overly exhaustive BYF (Before You Follow) and DNI (Do Not Interact) lists full of sometimes outlandish criteria<sup id="n3r"><a href="#n3">3</a></sup>, probably have similar bullet point style lists of all your likes, dislikes, and possibly identities and triggers (!)<sup id="n4r"><a href="#n4">4</a></sup> and probably not be the most pleasant person to interact with. I like to think I bucked that trend. My Carrd pages were generally very simple: a profile picture, a short bio (some shit like "Ada | 21 | 🇨🇦 | real life isopod"), and links to my socials. That was all. I remember adding the obligatory long-form bio and DNI list at some point, but those didn't last long. I believe it was around this time when the alias "deep twisty"<sup id="n5r"><a href="#n5">5</a></sup> came into being. I was just starting out making music at this point, posting crummy songs to SoundCloud that I'd made in an online editor called [EarSketch](https://earsketch.gatech.edu/landing/#/) that had you use Python to arrange pre-made loops and samples on a timeline. That shit was wack, yo, but that's beside the point. I was looking for an alias to release my music under, because I was intent on making more and my actual name wasn't gonna cut it. diff --git a/blog/posts/foodhero/index.md b/blog/posts/foodhero/index.md deleted file mode 100644 index 87445f0..0000000 --- a/blog/posts/foodhero/index.md +++ /dev/null @@ -1,3 +0,0 @@ -I'm gonna promote a product or service today, but I promise it's with good reason - my employer has gone and done something actually positive for once and I want to spread awareness of it. - -So, I work at a grocery store.
\ No newline at end of file diff --git a/blog/posts/post.php b/blog/posts/post.php index f8ed395..b541ada 100644 --- a/blog/posts/post.php +++ b/blog/posts/post.php @@ -97,10 +97,10 @@ foreach($feed->entry as $entry) { <nav style="flex-direction: column;"> <?php if($prevlink) { - echo("<a style='width: 100%; box-sizing: border-box;' href='$prevlink'><svg style='max-height: 1em;' xmlns='http://www.w3.org/2000/svg' fill='none' viewBox='0 4 28 16' stroke-width='1.5' stroke='currentColor' class='size-6'><path stroke-linecap='round' stroke-linejoin='round' d='m4.5 18.75 7.5-7.5 7.5 7.5' /><path stroke-linecap='round' stroke-linejoin='round' d='m4.5 12.75 7.5-7.5 7.5 7.5' /></svg>$prevtitle</a>"); + echo("<a style='width: 100%; box-sizing: border-box;' href='$prevlink'><b>Previous</b>: $prevtitle</a>"); } if($nextlink) { - echo("<a style='width: 100%; box-sizing: border-box;' href='$nextlink'><svg style='max-height: 1em;' xmlns='http://www.w3.org/2000/svg' fill='none' viewBox='0 4 28 16' stroke-width='1.5' stroke='currentColor' class='size-6'><path stroke-linecap='round' stroke-linejoin='round' d='m4.5 5.25 7.5 7.5 7.5-7.5m-15 6 7.5 7.5 7.5-7.5' /></svg>$nexttitle</a>"); + echo("<a style='width: 100%; box-sizing: border-box;' href='$nextlink'><b>Next</b>: $nexttitle</a>"); } ?> </nav> |
