diff options
Diffstat (limited to 'stats/index.php')
| -rw-r--r-- | stats/index.php | 222 |
1 files changed, 222 insertions, 0 deletions
diff --git a/stats/index.php b/stats/index.php new file mode 100644 index 0000000..eb17786 --- /dev/null +++ b/stats/index.php @@ -0,0 +1,222 @@ +<!DOCTYPE html> +<html lang="en"> + <head> + <meta charset="utf-8"> + <meta name="viewport" content="width=device-width, initial-scale=1"> + <title>Stats</title> + <link href="../style.css" rel="stylesheet" type="text/css" media="all"> + <style> + #statstable { + width: 100%; + } + #statstable td:first-child { + padding-left: calc(var(--stdpadding) / 2); + } + #statstable tr:nth-child(2n+1) { + background-color: #ffffff11; + } + @media only screen and (hover: none) { + #statstable td:first-child { + font-weight: bold; + } + } + </style> + <?php include($_SERVER['DOCUMENT_ROOT'] . '/seasonal.php'); ?> + </head> + <body> + <?php include($_SERVER['DOCUMENT_ROOT'] . '/nav.php'); bg(); ?> + <h1>stat tracker</h1> + <h2 id="caption">Powered by RealTrue™ StatAI™</h2> + <table id="statstable"> + <tbody><tr> + <td>Height</td> + <td>194cm</td> + </tr> + <tr> + <td>Storage space</td> + <td>47TiB</td> + </tr> + <tr> + <td>Desktop environment</td> + <td>GNOME (Wayland)</td> + </tr> + <tr> + <td>Layout</td> + <td>ANSI 75% + Knob + External numpad</td> + </tr> + <tr> + <td>Switches</td> + <td>Keychron K Pro Brown</td> + </tr> + <tr> + <td>Firmware</td> + <td>QMK</td> + </tr> + <tr> + <td>RGB</td> + <td>Yes</td> + </tr> + <tr> + <td>CDs owned</td> + <td>164</td> + </tr> + <tr> + <td>Consoles modded</td> + <td>2</td> + </tr> + <tr> + <td>Computers upgraded</td> + <td>3</td> + </tr> + <tr> + <td>Computers downgraded</td> + <td>2</td> + </tr> + <tr> + <td>Domains owned</td> + <td title="deeptwisty.com, isopod.cool, isopod.zone, bathynomus.xyz, flatfuckfri.day, isopod.mov">6</td> + </tr> + <tr> + <td>Talent</td> + <td style="font-family: mono; color: red;">[Integer overflow error]</td> + </tr> + <tr> + <td>Bitches</td> + <td>0</td> + </tr> + <tr> + <td>Species</td> + <td><i>Bathynomus Giganteus</i></td> + </tr> + <tr> + <td>Gender</td> + <td><?php + $boogeraids = array( + 'Unclear', + '404 Not Found', + '502 Bad Gateway', + 'I dropped it behind the sofa, sorry', + 'invalid null pointer', + 'what does that mean', + 'You fuckin\' figure it out', + 'Not my problem lol', + '[]', + 'I lost it in the accident', + 'Listed <a href="https://genders.wtf">here</a>', + 'AMD Ryzen 7 5700G, 32GB DDR4-3600 RAM, AMD Radeon RX 6800XT GPU, 500GB NVMe SSD, 2TB NVMe SSD, 4TB HDD', + 'I forgor đ', + '<i>Bathynomus Giganteus</i>', + 'I\'ll figure it out later', + 'gay', + '//TODO' + ); + echo $boogeraids[array_rand($boogeraids)]; + ?></td> + </tr> + <tr> + <td>3.5mm headphone jack</td> + <td>yes</td> + </tr> + <tr> + <td>Audio channels</td> + <td>mono</td> + </tr> + <tr> + <td>Font family</td> + <td style="font-family: b612_mono, mono, monospace;"><a href="https://b612-font.com/">mono</a></td> + </tr> + <tr> + <td>Sodium glutamate</td> + <td>7.1 surround</td> + </tr> + <tr> + <td>Drop rates</td> + <td style="white-space:nowrap;">1-3 bags of Doritos - 80% <br>Wired earbuds - 10% <br>Random Linux install media - 1%</td> + </tr> + <tr> + <td>Efficiency rating</td> + <td>80+ Gold</td> + </tr> + <tr> + <td>Wattage rating</td> + <td>1000W</td> + </tr> + <tr> + <td>Home address</td> + <td>12h 28m 24.97s, +31° 28Ⲡ37.7âŗ</td> + </tr> + <tr> + <td>Most played game (Steam)</td> + <td>Space Engineers (734 hours)</td> + </tr> + <tr> + <td>Most played game (in general)</td> + <td>Minecraft (Hours unknown but definitely high)</td> + </tr> + <tr> + <td>Best Hand</td> + <td>756,276,480</td> + </tr> + <tr> + <td title="Since this bit was added, anyway">Page views</td> + <td> + <?php + $num = (int) filter_var(file_get_contents("views.txt"), FILTER_SANITIZE_NUMBER_INT); + $num++; + file_put_contents("views.txt", $num); + echo $num; + ?> + </td> + </tr> + <tr> + <?php + $booger = array( + "arch", + "bogos", + "Hotel", + "blood" + ); + $aids = array( + "btw", + "binted", + "Trivago", + "inside (we think)" + ); + $poopaids_copy = array_rand($booger); + $boogeraids = $booger[$poopaids_copy]; + $aidsbooger = $aids[$poopaids_copy]; + echo "<td>$boogeraids</td><td>$aidsbooger</td>"; + ?> + </tr> + <tr> + <td>Number I'm thinking of</td> + <td><?php echo rand(0, 69421); ?></td> + </tr> + <tr> + <td>Personality</td> + <td><?php + $ei = array( + "E", + "I" + ); + echo $ei[array_rand($ei)]; + $sn = array( + "S", + "N" + ); + echo $sn[array_rand($sn)]; + $tf = array( + "T", + "F" + ); + echo $tf[array_rand($tf)]; + $jp = array( + "J", + "P" + ); + echo $jp[array_rand($jp)]; + ?></td> + </tr> + </tbody></table> + </body> +</html> |