Kind of dragon free!',
'This site uses cookies (chocolate chip)',
'Now with reduced centralization!',
'your gay',
'the fuck is a gender',
'One Of The Websites',
'𝓘𝓷𝓪𝓬𝓬𝓮𝓼𝓼𝓲𝓫𝓵𝓮!',
'Follow me on Google+!',
'404: caption not found',
'Web π compliant!',
'If you\'re seeing this, something is seriously wrong.',
'cringe',
'don\'t smoke cigarettes kids they\'ll make your lungs sus',
'real life isopod',
'holy fucking bingle',
'AI (Aquatic Isopod) generated',
'crubge',
'Only unpickle data you trust.',
'string(15) "Tested in prod!"',
'pwetty epic B)',
'Known to the state of California to cause cancer',
'Semi-modular!',
'Did you know?',
'shrimps is bugs',
'Delicious!',
'trnasgener',
'Opinionated!',
'Eurorack compatible!',
'Hackable!',
'HiDPI!',
'— addict',
'3D printed!',
'Federated!',
'Chitinous!',
'is this a bedbuge?',
'is this buge trans gener?',
'Now in HD!',
'Hard Disk Drive!',
'"Tablet or smartphone device"',
'Free Palestine!',
'Girl, we\'ve been knowing how to draw.',
'Upside Down!',
'RGB Gaming Webpage',
'It\'s @'.date("B").'. Do you know where your children are?',
'coke and fries halo',
'Check it out, I\'m in the house like carpet',
'Ordered dithering!',
'thats so weirdcore liminal analogue horror backrooms scp',
'steals your data! gives you virus!',
'this is where the funny randomly selected messages would go',
'a8e!',
'Better than Version 3.2 Gen 2x2!',
'Partially responsive!',
'On E since 2026/01/10!',
#'COUNTER',
'TUEADAY'
#'PLACEHIM',
);
break;
}
$cap = $captions[array_rand($captions)];
if($_GET['caption']) {
$cap = $captions[$_GET['caption']];
}
if(!$seasonal) {
switch($cap) {
case 'COUNTER':
$num = (int) filter_var(file_get_contents($datadir."caption_views.txt"), FILTER_SANITIZE_NUMBER_INT);
$num++;
file_put_contents($datadir."caption_views.txt", $num);
$cap = "This caption has been viewed $num times!";
break;
case 'TUEADAY':
$day = array("suday", "moday", "tueaday", "weaday", "thuday", "friaday", "satuaday")[date('w')];
$cap = "wait it's fucking $day. god.";
echo "";
break;
case 'PLACEHIM':
$cap = 'place him on your site immediately';
echo "";
break;
}
}
}
$host = $_SERVER['HTTP_HOST'];
function echolink($url, $name) {
global $host;
if("/$url" != $_SERVER['REQUEST_URI']) {
echo "$name";
} else {
echo "$name ";
}
}
?>
