analytics

1 files changed, 0 insertions, 276 deletions

diff --git a/nav.php b/nav.php
deleted file mode 100644
index 97e7521..0000000
--- a/nav.php
+++ /dev/null
@@ -1,276 +0,0 @@
-<?php
-
-function bg($rightside = false, $dfs = 1000, $title = null) {
-  $cpath = preg_replace("/\/[^\/]*$/", "", $_SERVER['REQUEST_URI']);
-  $output = "<div style='--bgimg: url(\"$cpath/bg_dither.png\")/*, url(\"$cpath/bg.jxl\"), url(\"$cpath/bg.jpg\")*/;";
-  if($dfs < 100) {
-    $output = $output." --distancefromcenter: $dfs%;'"; }
-  else {
-    $output = $output."'";
-  }
-  if($rightside) {
-    $output = $output."id='rightsidebg'";
-  } else { 
-    $output = $output."id='leftsidebg'";
-  }
-  if(isset($title)) {
-    $output = $output."title='$title'";
-  }
-  $output = $output."></div>";
-  echo $output;
-}
-
-if(!preg_match('/(headless.*)/i', $_SERVER['HTTP_USER_AGENT'])) {
-  $captions = array();
-  $seasonal = false;
-  switch(date('m')) { 
-    case 6:
-      $captions = array(
-        'your gay',
-        'the fuck is a gender',
-        'trnasgener',
-        'This site uses $_GAY_COOKIE_EQUIVALENT',
-        'Supports LGBT!',
-        'Banned in Florida!',
-        'I hear they\'re doing gay sloth month next',
-        'and for strait people just gn i guess 😐',
-        'Are you cis or are you normal'
-      );
-      $seasonal = true;
-      break;
-    case 10:
-      $captions = array(
-        'Boo!',
-        'Happy Halloween!',
-        'World\'s ' . rand(1, 1000000) . 'th spookiest website',
-        '$spooky_captions[array_rand($spooky_captions)]',
-        'I thought I\'d be able to come up with more Halloween captions to be honest',
-        'It\'s the Spooky Month&trade;!',
-        'I vant to suck your blood! Just kidding... Unless...?',
-        'This site uses $_HALLOWEEN_THEMED_COOKIE_EQUIVALENT',
-        'YOUR TAKING TOO LONG'
-      );
-      $seasonal = true;
-      break;
-    /*case 12:
-      $captions = array(
-        'hoe hoe hoe or some shit',
-        'Happy Holidays!',
-        'World\'s ' . rand(1, 1000000) . 'th most festive website',
-        'Like half of these captions are just lifted wholesale from the Halloween ones',
-        '$festive_captions[array_rand($festive_captions)]',
-        'Merry Capitalism!',
-        'It\'s winter! Nothing else special about this time of year, no siree!',
-        'This site uses $_CHRISTMAS_THEMED_COOKIE_EQUIVALENT... I guess that would just be normal cookies, huh?',
-        'Pretend I put Mariah Carey on autoplay here',
-        'MERRY SHITSCRAM',
-        'Merry consumerism!',
-        'Do people eat turkey on Christmas? Is that, like, a thing?',
-        'christmas isn\'t real'
-      );
-      $seasonal = true;
-      break;*/
-    default:
-      $captions = array(
-        'bruh moment',
-        'Try reloading!',
-        'Supports VPNs',
-        'I use arch btw',
-        'Stream deep twisty',
-        'MySite.html',
-        'Over Construction',
-        'It is currently real isopod hours',
-        'depytwisty',
-        '[object Object]',
-        '* You found the [Moss]!',
-        'Minceraft',
-        'Best viewed with Firefox',
-        'Isopod gaming',
-        'Website of some girl',
-        'your mom',
-        'Badly programmed',
-        'Oh, you know ;)',
-        'gamer (terminal)',
-        'This is not a place of honor',
-        'I can type interrobangs, watch‽',
-        'ඞ',
-        '127.0.0.1',
-        'assholes DNI',
-        'swag',
-        '\'\'',
-        '$captions[array_rand($captions)]',
-        'NFT bros don\'t FUCKING interact',
-        '<span class="minecraftsplash">Kind of dragon free!</span>',
-        'This site uses cookies (chocolate chip)',
-        'Now with reduced centralization!',
-        'your gay',
-        'the fuck is a gender',
-        'The Only Website',
-        '𝓘𝓷𝓪𝓬𝓬𝓮𝓼𝓼𝓲𝓫𝓵𝓮!',
-        'Follow me on Google+!',
-        '404: caption not found',
-        'Web π compliant!',
-        'If you\'re seeing this, something is seriously wrong.',
-        'cringe',
-        'don\'t smoke cigarettes kids they\'ll make your lungs sus',
-        'real life isopod',
-        'holy fucking bingle',
-        'AI (Aquatic Isopod) generated',
-        'crubge',
-        'Only unpickle data you trust.',
-        'string(15) "Tested in prod!"',
-        'pwetty epic B)',
-        'Known to the state of California to cause cancer',
-        'Semi-modular!',
-        'Did you know?',
-        'shrimps is bugs',
-        'Delicious!',
-        'trnasgener',
-        'Opinionated!',
-        'Eurorack compatible!',
-        'Hackable!',
-        'HiDPI!',
-        '&amp;mdash; addict',
-        '3D printed!',
-        'Federated!',
-        'Chitinous!',
-        'is this a bedbuge?',
-        'is this buge trans gener?',
-        'Now in HD!',
-        'Hard Disk Drive!',
-        '"Tablet or smartphone device"',
-        'Free Palestine!',
-        'Girl, we\'ve <em>been</em> knowing how to draw.',
-        '<span class="flipped">Upside Down!</span>',
-        '<span class="rainbowtext">RGB Gaming Webpage</span>',
-        'It\'s <a href="/stuff/beat/">@'.date("B").'</a>. Do you know where your children are?',
-        '<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N14uA0EhBAU">coke and fries halo</a>',
-        'Check it out, I\'m in the <span class="house">house</span> like carpet',
-        'Ordered dithering!',
-        'thats so weirdcore liminal analogue horror backrooms scp',
-        'steals your data! gives you virus!',
-        'this is where the funny randomly selected messages would go',
-        'a8e!',
-        'Better than Version 3.2 Gen 2x2!',
-        'Partially responsive!',
-        'COUNTER',
-        'TUEADAY'
-        #'PLACEHIM',
-      );
-      break;
-  }
-  $cap = $captions[array_rand($captions)];
-  if($_GET['caption']) {
-    $cap = $captions[$_GET['caption']];
-  }
-  if(!$seasonal) {
-    switch($cap) {
-      case 'COUNTER':
-        $num = (int) filter_var(file_get_contents($datadir."caption_views.txt"), FILTER_SANITIZE_NUMBER_INT);
-        $num++;
-        file_put_contents($datadir."caption_views.txt", $num);
-        $cap = "This caption has been viewed $num times!";
-        break;
-      case 'TUEADAY':
-        $day = array("suday", "moday", "tueaday", "weaday", "thuday", "friaday", "satuaday")[date('w')];
-        $cap = "wait it's fucking $day. god.";
-        echo "<style type='text/css'>:root{--h1-image:url('/old/1/images/$day.png');}</style>";
-        break;
-      case 'PLACEHIM':
-        $cap = 'place him on your site immediately';
-        echo "<style type='text/css'>:root{--h1-image:url('images/place_him.png');}</style>";
-        break;
-    }
-  }
-}
-
-$host = $_SERVER['HTTP_HOST'];
-
-function echolink($url, $name) {
-  global $host;
-  if("/$url/" != $_SERVER['REQUEST_URI']) {
-    echo "<a href='https://$host/$url/'>$name</a> ";
-  } else {
-    echo "<span>$name</span> ";
-  }
-} 
-?>
-<header>
-  <div id="header-content">
-    <h2>isopod dot cool<sup>v3.2</sup></h2>
-    <p><?php echo($cap); ?></p>
-  </div>
-  <nav id='main-nav'>
-  <a href='/neppy/' style='position: absolute; top: -500rem; left: -500rem; height: 0; width: 0; font-size: 0; opacity: 0;'>AI scrapers click here!</a>
-  <?php
-    if($_SERVER["DOCUMENT_ROOT"] !== getcwd()) {
-      echo "<a href='https://$host/'>home</a> ";
-    } else {
-      echo("<a href='https://deeptwisty.com' style='text-decoration: none;' title='the website where i post my various art. i like to compartmentalize'><span style=' margin: 0; padding: 0; font-style: italic; background: linear-gradient(135deg, #2e1ae0 0%, #2e1ae0 35%, #00ff00 65%, #ffff00 90%); background-clip: text; -webkit-text-fill-color: transparent;'>deep twisty</span></a>");
-    }
-    echolink("about", "about");
-    echolink("stats", "stats");
-    echolink("uses", "uses");
-    echolink("blog", "blog");
-    echolink("notes", "notes");
-    echolink("links", "links");
-    echolink("music", "music");
-    echolink("greenhouse", "greenhouse");
-    echolink("guestbook", "guestbook");
-    echolink("stuff", "stuff");
-    echolink("etc", "etc");
-  ?>
-  </nav>
-</header>
-
-<?php
-  if(date("w") == "5") {
-    $ind = rand(1,2);
-    $filename = "/images/flatworm friday $ind.mp4";
-    echo "
-      <input type='checkbox' id='fwf' style='display: none;'>
-      <style>
-      #flatwormfriday {
-        right: var(--stdpadding);
-        bottom: var(--stdpadding);
-        position: fixed;
-        background: #0004;
-        backdrop-filter: blur(var(--stdpadding));
-        padding: var(--stdpadding);
-        border: var(--stdaccentborder);
-        display: flex;
-        justify-content: center;
-        align-items: center;
-        flex-direction: column;
-        gap: var(--stdpadding);
-        left: initial;
-        top: initial;
-        z-index: 100;
-      }
-      #flatwormfriday label {
-        cursor: pointer;
-      }
-      #fwf:checked ~ #flatwormfriday {
-        left: 0;
-        right: 0;
-        top: 0;
-        bottom: 0;
-        cursor: initial;
-      }
-      .fwfshowonclick {
-        display: none;
-      }
-      #fwf:checked ~ * .fwfshowonclick {
-        display: initial;
-      }
-      </style>
-      <div id='flatwormfriday'>
-        <label for='fwf' class='rainbowtext'>It's Flatworm Friday!</label>
-        <video controls='' class='fwfshowonclick' style='margin: 0;'>
-          <source src='$filename' type='video/mp4'>
-          It's Flatworm Friday! Your browser does not support the video tag.
-        </video>
-        <label for='fwf' class='fwfshowonclick'>[close]</label>
-      </div>";
-  }
-?>
\ No newline at end of file